Swim little fish

I decided early on to take Ada swimming - she was around six weeks when she first went. On reflection I don't know why I took her so young - it's pretty crazy. I think I thought 'it's something to do' and also swimming is always going to be an important life skill. 

We went with a company called Puddle Ducks. They are really great. Each lesson is thirty minutes and the first lesson I think she cried for fifteen minutes, I feed her for ten, and there was five minutes where she was tolerant of it. The be fair to her it was probably extremely overwhelming for her, not to mention cold (her bath is around thirty-seven degrees, the pool just over thirty degrees). But slowly, lesson by lesson she got better. And then we stopped for summer holidays, so didn't swim for nearly eight (?) weeks or so. 

On our return, she moved up a class (she was in 'floaties' and is now in 'splashers') and one of the NCT mums that I went with stopped going because she moved further away. There was was one mum from the floaties class that I knew, but everyone else I didn't. It felt like the first day of school - all the other mums knew each other and were quite cliquey (in reality that are really quite nice and I was just being overly sensitive). And Ada absolutely hated it. It was like she had not gone to any previous swimming lessons at all. I thought maybe it was because she hadn't gone in such a long time but the next lesson was equally as bad, if not worse. There was a moment in the class where I thought I might cry - Ada was that upset. And then I thought 'she hasn't asked to be put through this, this is something I've decided for her, and if she's upset it's not her fault {not that I think when she's ever upset it's her fault}) So with this epiphany moment I realised I had to change my attitude about it all (I'm sure Ada was picking up on my apprehension as well). We did some extra swimming the day before our normal swimming  classes to get her a bit more used to it and she really enjoyed it. And then she in turned enjoyed her lessons more too. The teacher, Kirsty, realised that Ada is (generally) fine if I'm holding her and I would swim her under the water to her and not vice versa. She would get a little upset about the underwater moments, but this was only for ten seconds or so.

And then last Friday something wonderful happened. I sat Ada down by the side of the pool, with Kirsty and she cried (as always) until I got into the water and she came back to me. She was then smiling and splashing around. During this lesson, I would give her to Kirsty and she would swim Ada back to me, first above the water and then underneath. We discussed that we would see how Ada would do firstly above the water and if she got upset, I would do the underwater swim to Kirsty. But Ada was completely fine. And then the second time around Kirsty was able to swim Ada to me, without any tears. When Ada surfaced again no tears. She was really, really happy. Some of the other mums mentioned how good Ada was as well. It was the best lesson she every had. I don't want to count my chickens before they've hatched (but let's face it, I already have) but I'm really hoping we've turned our swimming corner.

Her 'anxious-about-swimming' look

I mean, seriously, look how little she is - what was I thinking?

Sleep

Sleep is a thing that most new (and existing?) parents fret over. We are constantly told before the baby arrives to make sure we enjoy our sleep because it will never be the same again. And it's true but also ridiculous. It's not as if I can bank my sleep before having a baby, cashing in six months later when I'm walking around all zombie like.

I remember in the first two weeks (the 'fog') I would become extremely anxious about the evenings. It was winter here still so it would get dark around four or five, and I would start to panic thinking 'what if I'm up all night, how am I going to function the next day?' It was actually really awful, the feeling still so vivid - I can feel it in my stomach. Dave would send me to bed after I had fed Ada and he would stay up with her but I felt as though I was meant to be up with my new family too. Same went for naps during the day. Dave would look after Ada but I thought I should be around them. Eventually I learnt to nap during the day and to not worry so much about the impending nights. I wasn't up all night and even if I did get less sleep then I had hoped too I always figured I could nap during the day and catch up on what I missed the previous night. 

The next fews months things got better, at least in the night. Ada would wake every three or four hours, and my body just got used to the broken six or seven hours of sleep (Also, I realise that in the grand scheme of things, this is pretty good - some mums have it so much more rough then me). And then when Ada was four and a half months old we went to Australia for three weeks to visit family and friends. The first night was horrendous. She, obviously, was all over the place and I think I had about two three hours sleep. I was so upset the next morning. My mum took Ada and I crawled back into bed with Dave and just cried. My emotional state was probably dictated by my sleep depravation, but I felt so so guilty that I had bought Ada half way across the world, trying to coerce her (in a completely non aggressive way) to sleep at a time when she wanted to be awake. In the end we just bought Ada to bed with us and she slept on me most of the night. But that Australia trip was probably the worst jet lag I've ever had. It gradually got better and by the time we were in Melbourne, she was (mostly) sleeping through the night once more. But then we had to do that twenty four hour plus flight again, and start the jet lag process all over again. Except this time I didn't have my Mum and Dave to take her while I slunk back into bed. I was in struggle town.

And then again, we got into a better sleeping pattern, slowly but surely. We did some sleep training and we were able to put her down at seven thirty and she would, ninety-nine per cent of the time, sleep through the night. The occasional wake ups when she had four teeth coming through, or was just having an 'off' night, and you're catapulted back to newborn days. 

So lack of sleep, in the end, wasn't as scary as I throught it would be. Like most things in life (mine anyway) it was the fear of the unknown that was worrisome - the reality is never as bad as you imagine it to be (a mantra I need to remind myself often). However, I will stake a claim though that parents (and insomniacs, probably) know the real value of sleep.  I mean really know the value. That one hours extra sleep before the alarm goes off after having been up for four hours with a teeth baby? Oh man, that's the sweetest dream. 

Amsterdam

Last weekend we took a little family trip to Amsterdam. I (and Ada, obviously) had never been before, but Dave had gone a few years ago, but it was nice to go with the three of us.

Day one

For the first (?) time, I booked a flight that wasn't at six am from an airport on the other side of London (Stansted, Luton), but a more baby-friendly time of eleven am from Gatwick - a mere thirty minute train ride away. However we missed our train from Victoria which put us slightly behind schedule. By the time we got to the check in desk we had 50 minutes until our flight departed (check in closed forty-five minutes before departure - so we were actually cutting it very close). Needless to say, Dave was a bit (a lot) angry with me. He may even had said (did say) if we miss this flight we're going home. But we were ushered to the front of the queue at check-in and made it to the plane as it started boarding. Ada was wonderful on the flight - I fed her on take off and she fell asleep the whole way (to be fair it's only forty-five minutes though - it took us longer to get to the airport). As we were getting off some people said 'we didn't even know there was a baby on the plane'. Cue smug parents look and silent high fives.

When we got to Amsterdam we found out apartment. I say we, but really it was Dave. He is frightenly good at directions, like it's his super power or something. We dumped our bags and ventured out to the walk around, bought some groceries and explored the city. 


Day two
The second day started off grey and miserable and pretty much continued that way until the afternoon. I had booked a restaurant for lunch. So after getting ourselves and Ada ready, we set off. Lunch was really lovely, we were the only people there for lunch. Dave said that in the past he would have felt uncomfortable being in such an empty place, but now, with a nearly nine month old it was bliss. We didn't have to worry about her annoying anyone else, we could take our time and she could make as much noise as she wanted.

Day three
Sunday started off on a much brighter note than Saturday. We decided to hire bikes, one with a baby seat for Ada. We got our bike around nine-thirty and set off. I was planning on cycling with her most of it, but my bike was so high that I found it almost impossible to ride. I could get on it, but felt unstable if I were to come to a red light. So Dave, being a couple of centimetres taller than me (and generally a better cyclist as well) cycled with her on the road. I was a bit worried how she would react - if she would start crying, or if it was too cold for her. But she loved it. She was so excited. We cycled to Vondelpark which was beautiful. Loads of other families cycling, people exercising, tourist meandering. Around lunch time we headed to the Van Gogh museum, and a bite to eat. We ate, Ada ate and fell asleep. The line to the Van Gogh museum was so long, that we decided to give it a miss (sorry Van Gogh, but I've seen Sunflowers at the National Gallery anyway...). Instead we walked around the markets that were in the square and bought some cute things for Ada. After lunch we cycled to the Rembrandtpark, which was much quieter than Vondelpark but no less beautiful. After stopping to feed Ada her lunch, we headed back home, via one last cycle around Vondelpark.

Day four
Monday it was time to head home. We planned our journey with much more time to spare than the flight there, so no tense husband and wife conversations.  However our flight was delayed by at least an hour, which was slightly annoying. Ada was the opposite of the angel baby on the flight to Amsterdam - she was a super miserable grump. There was no smug looks from Dave and I, instead, it was the 'I'm really sorry my baby is grizzling, I'm trying the best I can' look. Of course she fell asleep ten minutes before we had to land though. And then promptly woke up fifteen minutes later as we were going through immigration. We arrived home at five pm to a very excited cat, and a very tired baby. She ended up going to bed without any milk because she was so tired (she did wake up at ten pm and I gave it to her, which she gladly took).

We had such a wonderful time, but coming back it felt a little bittersweet to me. I was looking forward to this holiday so much, but now the only event on my horizon is my return to work and Ada starting nursery. I knew it was going to happen, but it feels likes it's come around so quick.

This is how we eat and entertain in a studio apartment with a sleeping baby

The little pokey outey tongue? - it slays me!

Ready to go home 

A letter to Ada

Little dove! You are eight months young today! Again, you're with your dad because I'm at school, but I know you're having a wonderful time. At eight months you have six teeth. Before we had you I thought that teething would be a horrendous ordeal but these six litre chompers haven't been that bad (I'm sure your molars will be a different story entirely). We've only had one or two mid morning wake ups where it seems all you want me to do is hold you but only if I'm the most uncomfortable ever. No lying on the couch at four am. No, I have to sit on your bedroom floor, with my back resting against the wardrobe cupboards. You seem to sense of I've even put a cushion behind me. All in all we've handled it pretty well.

You are *this close* to crawling. You can worm across the floor, but haven't quite worked out that getting on your knees is much easier. Either which was (I suspect) you hate it and get really frustrated when you can't get close to me. I don't know how long to let you get upset and figure it out for yourself or just help you. (Typical answer - not very long)

So you don't like crawling/worming but you love standing. And this week, if your dad or I are holding your hands, you love walking too. You can pull yourself up using the coffee table as leverage and hold onto it with one hand, and it gives you so much delight. Your balance isn't quite there yet and you do sometimes fall over and give yourself a bump. But a little kiss and a cuddle and you're standing yourself up again and it's soon forgotten.

You're a really funny baby and love smiling at strangers on the bus, who in turn smile back at you. You think the funniest thing is when I or your dad make silly noises at you (the pig snort is a particular favourite) or when we dance really badly (I mean really, really, badly).  I know it's a bit of a cliche but there is no sweeter sounds than your laughter, so we will do whatever we can to make it happen.

Your favourite food is porridge with banana. You get quite demanding in the morning which is quite funny. You'll bang your hands on your highchair if I'm too slow giving you your next mouthful. But really, you love all food - especially if I'm eating it. 

We heart the mornings

Mornings are great for us. Ada is beyond happy first thing in the morning. She hears one (or both) of us creaking into her room and her little face just lights up like it's Christmas morning. She is absolutely crazy over breakfast - she loves porridge and toast and if I'm eating cereal get's super cranky if she doesn't get some. 

We have mornings naps down as well. She generally wakes up around seven am, and goes down for her morning nap around nine-thirty / ten. Again, when she wakes up, she is delighted to see me once more (seriously Ada - I'm always going to be there).

This morning I got our proper camera out and took some shots of her. Because I've never used the camera before she is fascinated by it and the shutter sound which makes for some great photos.